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Monday, October 15, 2007 / 10:55 PM
stressing out I guess everyone must have been saying how stressed they are and all that. "I'm stressed" is a frequent phrase i use nowadays, and i don't say that just to be like everybody else or to pretend to be. I am really stressed out. Under so much pressure. Just did TJC, ACJC and SAJC's math paper 1. And i failed everyone of them. Seriously, i feel so down. Its tough not being able to solve math questions and the question just stares at you in the face yet you have no solution for it. It sucks so bad that i wanna die you know. Like in the exam hall, everyone is scribbling and pressing their GCs so furiously, yet i am in slow mo. Damn! I dunno how to handle this sinking feeling. It just feels bad, you know? As if i am hopeless and beyond redemption. I know i should buck up for tmr's mock math paper 1, but i just feel so terrible about it. I hate to fail it AGAIN, cos its the LAST trial i can have before the real thing comes along. And i cant revise tmr morning because we have some farewell assembly and that is gonna take some time. And we gotta take back our prelims results. HUR HUR HUR... The mock will be at LT1 at 12 noon. Now that is scary. I am having a headache now. My neck feels stiff. And i keep getting the runs. Out of nervousness. HELP ME! Even my lines and thoughts seem fragmented. I guess i shouldnt have been so lackadaisical in my attitude and everything. I was just a complacent bitch. And i think i should make up for that NOW. I don't know what is wrong with me man, all this negativity and bad aura. Just feel breathless and smothered. Tired and under immense pressure. Am i still gonna make it? I really wanna go to NUS and take up theater studies or sociology. Its so tempting and i really wanna make it. Well i guess this sort of ranting and whining doesn't really help to make my goals seem any easier. Saps away the energy while i worry all day long. SIGH. Everyone goes through this stage, and i WILL overcome this hurdle. JIA YOU SHULI!!! GO GO GO!!! |
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