Tuesday, October 26, 2010 / 9:20 PM
don't be too sure

Everytime i try something it doesn't work.
Especially with you, where my efforts just make me look like a fool.
Repairing relationships, past events just bother me too much.
But you, you take me for a fool.
Relishing in how i look stupid while i beg for your attention.
No, i tried my best already.
And you don't reciprocate.
Good, good.
Be in your cocoon then.
You think i am nothing, but hey, don't count your chickens before they hatch.
Just you wait, just you wait.
I am already going to sparkle.

Monday, October 25, 2010 / 9:58 PM
i miss montreal

Suddenly feel very tired. Prolly because of the late dinner. Sleepy.

I miss Montreal so much, especially looking at the pictures of those who are on exchange. Wish i could have the money and just fly back now!

/ 12:00 AM

Had a bout of mild panic attack just now when i was looking at the amount of things to do suddenly. The whole world just crashed into me and i almost forgot to breathe.

Changed a new blogskin, thought this looks not too bad. Although i am a total tech idiot with the html and cannot edit some stuff that i want :\

School is back tmr, and it's unbelievably week 11. Have a sinking feeling, but dunno how to save myself properly. Not good.

Okay, i need my mail to my love now.

Sunday, October 24, 2010 / 12:17 AM

Time flies.

The rain is making my world hazy and heavy.

Friday, October 22, 2010 / 1:48 AM
Mindy Gledhill - Hourglass

Super like this song at the moment. Very serene, tranquil and speaks volumes about life.

So when you reach for the stars, don't forget who you are.

Take heart.

Thursday, October 21, 2010 / 12:20 AM

thanks for always anchoring me right where i belong


Monday, October 18, 2010 / 10:45 PM
not a poem

Every night, a light dims
A smile fades,
Eyes close.
The cities come to a still
The clouds to a lull
The occasional breeze
No pedestrians.
We fall asleep,
And hope to dream.
The skies are colourless,
With the faint glimmer of a distant star.
I turn to stare at the open window,
The dreams flew
Straight out of one's grasp,
And beyond what can be found.
Wildly gesturing in the air,
Seeking solace in what can be repaired,
Perhaps to just feel a little less sombre.
Pearls fall,
Diamonds sparkle.

That's just life.

/ 1:59 AM
for you

As i have always mentioned in my posts, the night always makes me melancholic and memories and emotions just flood in.

I guess this post is for you, if you so happen to still read my blog.


School has been a flurry, and it's already week 10. All the juniors are mulling over this and that and filled with energy to bust the finals. Old and frail me here still stuck in the whirlpool of Montreal. Miss McGill and Montreal so much, and all the memories there. I guess i could have done my SEP a lot better, being more generous, more carefree, more relaxed and happier. That's a small price to pay for plonking head on into things that no one has ever given you advice on. But it was definitely all worth it. Afterall, how many times can you do it in your lifetime?

Missed everything so much.

But hey, i am glad to be back with my family. Although i must say that some friends have been terribly estranged from me, but despite reparation efforts, some have definitely been playing on broken strings.

Voila, mademoiselle, c'est la vie.

Friday, October 15, 2010 / 12:14 AM
used to dream a little

There used to be this little girl named Lisa, who dreamt of butterflies, princesses and of course, to be a beautiful singer adored by many or an air stewardess who flies all around the world, taking in all the sights and doing so much shopping.

As she grew up, such fantasies started to become more grounded, although she never stopped dreaming. She longed for a day where she could really spread her wings and fly, to be someone who she always wanted to be. She did okay in school, didn't particularly stand out and was of average standing. She didn't had boys who chased after her, and she was a good good girl. Lisa was the kind of daughter everyone would not mind having, because she was such an obedient girl, with occasional tantrums but they are not too bad.

Her parents adored her, showered her with gifts and such, and this made her insensitive to money. Her friends would often be surprised at her extravagance, and her generosity, but still that didn't deter her spending habits. Until her family downgraded.

Fast forward.

Lisa was popular, smart and well-liked, but now she is just rock bottom. Suddenly her friends disappear, and she loses the big groups and big laughters. She seeks to find out what is wrong, but some people don't reciprocate. The more she tries the more saddened she is, and the more she feels like killing herself.

It would definitely be a quick way to stop thinking so much, but hey Lisa, are you sure this is worth it?

Wednesday, October 13, 2010 / 1:48 AM
red pixels

Well, using this red pixel skin for the time being. The old blogskin had some pictures that photobucket wouldn't host. Not really in the mood to edit everything.

School has been awfully fast, and i guess i am not a projects person. I prefer doing essays, reading journals and books but not doing art and craft.

Need some rejuvenation.

Sunday, October 10, 2010 / 1:27 AM

Always have been reflecting on myself, and always thought i could have done better for so many situations. To have been more astute, more sincere, more thoughtful... All the what-ifs and should-have-beens always come back to me.

Today marks a special day, 10-10-10! Cool, and never will we be able to get something like this again. Once lost, that's that.

Anyway, have been too slack recently. Need to get back my groove fastttttttttttt.

Till the next time.

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musings of a superhero girl
All the love in the world, dear John