Monday, September 24, 2007 / 1:05 AM
attack of the cannot-stop-shopping syndrome

I think i have a problem. I seem to delight in retail therapy sometimes. I know it is not supposed to be encouraged but i feel so terrible with the amount i spent on clothes just this 5 days. It is bad, i know, but i want clothes. I admit i don't need them but hey, the clothes were certainly worth the dough. Nice tweed-like shorts, a sweet button up top, a zara tee, a flowy knee-length skirt and the ASD t shirt. Oh and 2 new pairs of socks.

Sheesh.I may have to live on bread or worst, water for the rest of the week.

And talking about the rest of the week, i fear for the WORST. We are getting back our math paper 1 on tue, which is correctly speaking, tomorrow. And math paper 2 will be ready on friday. Meanwhile, i bet my econs tutor must be having seizures at his seat or his veins are almost ready to pop at the sight of my answer script. I am almost hearing his sigh as i type now. I go for so many consultations and seeked so much from him yet i am worst than someone who hasn't. And i really let him down i guess.

It doesn't matter how many consultations you have been to or how many essays you have written and submitted for him to mark. As long as you flipped or you go complacent, poof! all the efforts go down the drain as easy as you flinch. I hate it man. The feeling of disappointment all the time. I loathe to get back GP too. Everything is just terrible and horrible, even more shocking than seeing the movie poster of Rose McGowan's movie character with a machine gun as a leg.

I am having troubles sleeping at night. I toss and turn around but i can never seem to fall asleep proper. It disturbs me that i cannot have a good night's sleep even though i have had a long day. I don't know what exactly is wrong but i was just wondering if this could be caused by me studying for too long in my bedroom. Maybe I carried all the tension and stress from my study table all the way to my bedtime? That could be possible, judging by how restless i have became. And it has gotten regular these days, unabling to fall asleep and i had to toss and turn around in bed for about an hour or so before i force myself to gradually fall asleep. I've tried lavender massaging oil with the hope of relaxing so that i can sleep easier. Though it works, it is tentative at times. Sometimes i respond good to it, sometimes it keeps me awake. Boo.

I have no idea about "curing" this sleep thing. Meanwhile, lavender massage oil is my best alternative.

Oh yeah and there was Singapore SOKA Association SD (Student Division) concert today at Tampines ICA and man, was it a BLAST! The crowd was so huge that the audience seats extende all the way out to the lobby from the main hall. Everything was just plain awesome and there were lots of new friends and faces around, so it made everything more exciting and novel. The concert was themed as "Pintar el Futuro" or "The World is Yours to Change". It showcased many videos that raised global issues ( perfect for some heated GP discussions or essays) and the performances were great. I loved the dance put up by TP cos it totally rocked the house! WHOO~~~ Then there was this fantastic singer named Tong Tong who sang a Cantonese song of Beyond's and boy, she was so good! Pitch perfect with awesome stage charisma. Loved her. Then there were song items by bands and yeah, it was a pretty fun experience.

ASD then had a farewell for our dearest Xuanyou who is flying off to UK this wed for Imperial College. Sob sob! So gonna miss him. We sang "Peng You" and presented him with gifts. Xuanyou is so hilarious BECAUSE he took the scarf we gave him and turned it into a....TURBAN!

-__- eh heh heh heh~

Ok lah that boy is funny. Saw him teary-eyed before we left and well, ALL THE BEST BIG GUY!

Afterwhich the girls and i walked all the way from ICA back to Tampines interchange and we had dinner and some jalan jalan at the mall. Took some neoprints, bought a shirt and then went crazy for a while before we took the train home. Super beat but really happy. Loved being with the girls!

Anyway, today is a brand new day. Gonna go study at je lib later in the day.

I love you honey.

Wednesday, September 19, 2007 / 11:53 PM
online browsing at

Although the nautical look was so last season, this ensemble is just stylish to the top.

I like the texture of this top and how it makes you feel feminine and gentle.

My favourite- the black and the white just amalgamates into mod chic.

Like the sporty and youthful feeling of this drawstring skirt.

Nice emerald sash across the waist adds definition and a little sexiness at the top.

Green cocktail dress with gems encrusted at the waist.


The tunic design makes the shoulders look so beautiful.

Just like this dress.

I like the effect of the brushes of the colour.

Great for prom.

SHOESMy favourite pair of flats because of the yellow designs on the outside. They are comfortable yet understately stylish open-toed.

This is very resort-like with the white straps and woven wedge. Great for walking too.

This works well when you are at some glitzy event with a nice dress or just wanna wear it to feel all pampered and rich. But dun glam it up everywhere with jewels. You dun wanna be a walking disco ball.

I like the turquoise colour of this pair of heels cos its so fresh and rejuvenating. Works well for tanned and fair skin.

Romantic and yet princessy, the black bow touches up the otherwise plain satin heel. Good to wear if you are on a date.

This is just power. It makes you feel like you are in control with the sharp heel and smooth finish.

This looks uncannily like a Prada creation but at a cheaper price. However, the look that it brings out is old Hollywood glamour and glitz.

This has got a cute green design on the outside with floral prints on the inside. Great for a day at the park or simply having a picnic with all your girlfriends.

Nice to pair it with a pair of flirty shorts and a nice vintage tee.

Red is a colour people seldom wear on their feet. But this season, though red is fading, this pair works it with a chiffon skirt.


I like the overall Boho feel of this wrap skirt and the colour is neutral and based. It gives an Earthy Mama feel to it and i would most certainly wanna buy this!

This beautiful black V neck dress is just the perfect LBD i ever wanted. Nice lace designs on the top.

Great for preggers or those who are extremely thin. Unique white in the middle.

Nice print and great texture. It will be fantastic to pair this up with a pair of black pumps or heels to show some colour contrast.


I like how this bag oozes romance and feminism. It feels so delicate and pretty!

This bag is slightly bulkier, with the metallic sheen that gives it a very polished look. Definitely the type to carry on a power-up day.

This is definitely ideal for a relaxed evening out with your boyfriend or for social events. Simple in cream white with a little creases.

This is another pouch from Coach. Like the patchwork design that veers away from the usual designs with the "Cs" all around. Screams of an organised messiness.

I like this bag too cos it just speaks volumes about the carrier. It has got this vibe that takes you through the streets of NYC and the office instantly. Whatever city you are in, this bag is totally cool.

Yet another classic bad with flap from Coach. It will do you good if you are just using it for a shopping trip cos it fits snugly a phone, wallet, keys, sunglasses and some tissue. Not forgetting some lip gloss and eye liner :D

Coach Classic
I like the faded colour on this bag cos not many bags have this colour. Its just sweet without being cloying and it goes well with most colours.

This looks good on anyone, cos it fits well on the shoulders with the Burberry-like print. A little punk and cute nonetheless.

Love everything that i have put up.
Now gotta train the body to fit nicely in those.
And look for cheaper and more accessible alternatives.
Hoped you liked them!


Tuesday, September 18, 2007 / 10:18 PM

Change of font! Kinda strange to see your words being typed out in another form.

Well,anyway. Tmr is the last paper (Math Paper 2 with all the stats) and i am not in my best form. Everyone around me has been falling sick, with some having quite persistent ones. There is coughing and sneezing in almost every exam venue, and it gets worse when it is air-conditioned. I have been unfortunately down with sore throat and a very bad migraine for 2 days already. And monday was econs + literature, and that almost sapped away all my energy. What was the school thinking when they slotted two such "heavy" papers on the same day?! Bollocks. And i bet it must have been worse for the history students who take lit too cos its always math+history. Crazy time-table.

And right now i am still revising stats. Hopefully i will know how to go about attempting the math qns tmr afternoon. Cos i've persisted so hard and persevered to do as much practice qns i can. And got snubbed by some people whom i shall not mention here. Sigh. My head is throbbing so hard like the fluttering of the wings of a butterfly under my skin. Why do people get headaches? Is it due to the brain trying to force the user to pause and let it cool down? Ahhh. Now i am talking nonsense.

Looking forward for some TLC after the prelims but then think i shouldn't. Afterall i don't really deserve a break for the terrible performance for it. It just perturbs me at my level of intelligence sometimes. It can get so LOW.

And then i wonder how to pull it up and up and UP.

But before i start breaking down i tears and go into some monotonous recital of my inferiority complex, i recall an IM with a friend. I was complaining to her that i feel that i am really stressed out and its just that people seem to think that i know everything and i will be fine. Then she said maybe it was because i had a "confidence aura" around me, thats why people always assumed that i'm confident and all raring to go.

I've never been a really confident person.

I mean everyone has got to have a minimum dosage of confidence in whatever she does, otherwise there just seems to be no value. I know that of course. Perhaps i am just outspoken, always saying things and reciting the formulas so people think i'm good? But again that sounds patronising. I dunno man. Its just so mind-blowing in a negative sort of way when you are constantly surrounded by people who are ace-ing their subjects like a breeze while i am still here slugging like a snail up a slope. Damn its so unfair but its so prevalent. An acquaintance once commented that he believed that everyone is entitled so the same talent, and it is irregardless of whether it is inborn or nurtured. Everyone can succeed.

Yeah that is absolutely true.

It become redundant and sickening when i keep lamenting on how tough studies are right now. Sheesh! I'm already better off than those who don't even get to attend primary school in other countries. I have a nice home to live in, comfortable clothes to wear and get to have full meals. Its just plain stupid to keep complaining about how bad things are. And millions of people had taken the A levels and moved on. So why can't i do it too?

Keeping my eyes on NUS right now. NUS!NUS!NUS! FASS will be THE faculty to go. And even though things arent looking good for me now, the prelims don't matter. You don't need the prelims to get 1st three months in uni. The ultimate goal is the A LEVELS and man, i'm so gonna conquer it. I HAVE TO and i WANT to. Gee.

OK before that i just gotta concentrate on the most urgent task at hand: math paper 2 tmr.

Back to the world of statistics.

AMERICA FERERRA won the Best Actress for her comedy "Ugly Betty"!
Thus it goes to show that having a hot bod won't get you a prize.
Work the inner beauty, ladies.

Saturday, September 08, 2007 / 4:57 PM
Doctor's brief statement.

Crippling and paralysing, it moves in swift action whenever it sees a chance or an opportunity. You don't even feel a sting or an itch and it has already infected you. It causes you to break out, have breathing difficulties and some may even hallucinate. Some, to be a little extreme, may opt for suicide to relieve this suffering. Its effects are that strong. No scientific cure has been truly effective, even though there are some unorthodox treatments for this. Some have recommended medication, CT scans and even hypnosis. More scientists advise a healthy lifestyle with a balanced diet, but that hardly works for those who are infected. What they want are immediate cures, not something that will only work in the long term.

This illness has been around for eons, that even the most primeval have had a taste of it. It does not just affect human beings; animals can get this illness too. But it is harder for animals to be diagnosed for the symptoms are subtle only till a later stage.

In fact, this illness is in all of us. It only manifests itself into a full-blown illness when it has a chance to, when you let down your guards, when you let your fundamental weakness take over you. Sounds scary huh?

This illness may take on several names for different people, according to the brief introduction stated above. Some may reckoned it to be this, others that. In any case, it is essential to maintain a strong immunity and resilience in order to fight this illness. It could get contagious.

So, start studying hard now.


Friday, September 07, 2007 / 12:57 AM
crazy babbling

Its late at night and Shuli is here for some emo-ing again. Ha ha.

What the hell. I realised that physical geography is quite crazy. I don't know how i spent my J1, cos i don't understand what i am reading now on rock cycles and whatever shitty limestone formations. Seriously, what have i been doing for physical geography lessons for the whole of last year? Was i asleep or knocked-out cold or scared shitless so much so that i didn't take in anything? Boy, this is horrible.

Then the syllabuses don't make me feel any better cos its requirements KILLS. I don't even recall rock cycle and the different types of rocks being taught. Everything seems to be a blur. And i absolutely LOVEEEEEE human geography because i can relate to it. Stuff like globalisation and urbanisation is going on in my country, but what about landslides and earthquakes? Ok maybe the occasional rotational scarp or slight landslide at Eng Neo Ave.

And i don't know how i spent this week, cause there are TONS AND TONS of stuff that i have yet to cover!!! What the hell is wrong with me? And i feel stretched out and BURNED OUT by geog already. There is still econs, lit and math..BOLLOCKS.

I guess i have no choice but to evaluate my comparative advantage of subjects. I am kinda disheartened by physical geog. So maybe that goes away first. Damn. I hate to spot topics to study. Geography is insane! And then there is my ultra weak Math and scary Econs to grapple with. Literature sounds ok, at least i can manage a pass.

I am losing hair like crazy.

And what the hell am i doing by wasting time to type this entry?!! Do i look like i have a lot of spare time?!?!?HUH?!!?!

I REALLY NEED some sedatives and tonic soups. Preferably those that stimulate intelligence and memory.


Tuesday, September 04, 2007 / 12:17 AM

Been kind of melancholy this week. Studying hard for Prelims and trying to keep my head above the water. These wants just sort of popped up in my mind, prolly due to the amount of newspaper articles i have been perusing.

  1. i want (NEED!) to get a minimum of B for every subject for my A Levels
  2. i want to fall in love with a nice guy and date him
  3. i want to lose the unnecessary fats on me
  4. because of 3., i want to get more clothes
  5. i want to go to Hokkaido, Tokyo, Belgium, Greece, Paris, Taiwan, New York, LA for some serious sight-seeing and holidaying!
  6. i want to get into NUS
  7. i want to build a house by a lake
  8. i want to ride a horse freely in the wilderness
  9. i want to have good job prospects
  10. i want to be happy
Well, some of the above are not too hard to fulfill cos its about time or money. Others depend on myself. Really stressed out by the Prelims, but not too stressed enough. Keep feeling complacent and a little lethargic. I hate to be unprepared, yet i'm kind of causing this insecurity. ARGHHHH.

Anyway, my mum said something fun the other day when i was complaining about my lack of romantic life. I was going on and on about how "deprived" i am and how unwanted her daughter is. Seriously, where are the guys?!?!

Then she was saying i should take my time, maybe include this boyfriend thing in my prayers too. But i shrugged, cause i dun wanna pray for a boyfriend! Doesn't it seem a little, weird? So i was saying that at 18 and without a boyfriend unlike many of my peers, i feel a little left out and you know, i'm a sucker for romance and its just....ugh! So she was like so what if you are 18? Who may meet the One when you are 28!

Ok i shudder at the next empty 10 years.

Anyway, its all getting a little too busy for boyfriend-hunting, at least not with the scarce resources i am getting in my circle of friends. Man, what happened to resource allocation? Allocative efficiency?!!?

I'm losing my mind.

Its kinda ironic that i am typing down all these late at night. But the night makes one even more melancholic. Years i've had this crush on this one guy, but strangely there seems to be no chemistry going on between the two of us. It has always been one-sided. He takes me as an acquaintance, just someone to say hi and bye to. He's not mean or whatsoever, just normal. I have never told him how i felt but maintained this friendship at arm's length. Its ok, i guess.

There have been confessions to me but i never agreed. Probably its because i don't see the other side of the equation. Or there were no mutual feelings. Maybe its all about the feeling. If the feeling is right, its gonna be a whirlwind romance. But i've never gotten that, though sometimes i think about it.

Boo what's wrong with me?Hahaha..talking about all these. Maybe i should really be a DJ or something, get my own show and just talk. Would love that.

Anyway, econs consultation tmr. A day of exchange rates, monetary policy and assumptions to whack!

your life lays out like the shadows of the wall
you turn the lights on to release them all
you wonder what's it like to not feel worthless
so open all the blinds and turn those curtains


bio tag misc past
musings of a superhero girl
All the love in the world, dear John