Sunday, February 26, 2006 / 5:47 PM

Wow...determination is a nice word. Gets you all pumped up and ready to face whatever obstacles that may come your way. I like that.

Just finished my GP essay and i just wanna collapse. Ok~ exaggerated it a lil.

Went shopping with Xinying and Abi and we had loads of fun! First we went to Ajisen for some ramen ( the silver fish tastes real good) and chatted for a while. Then we went for some neo prints and u can clearly see who is the wackiest at poses..haha. But i had to leave early so tad was kinda sad. It only lasted 2 hours! Argh... sorry sorry...its my fault. >.< But we shall go out another time!

5 more days to the release of postings result. Hmm~ apprehensive of what is going to come. Yeah, should just be brave and come what may! Hopefully it will be the right one.

Oh yeah just realised something. Cleaning up one's room has a therapeutic affect.


Tuesday, February 21, 2006 / 10:47 PM

All right folks... Please do this test for me will yeah? It's a personality test that will enable me to find out more about myself too. Thanks loads!

/ 9:02 PM
mu mu um um

Another day has gone past just like that and i felt kind of empty inside. Like it drifted through my fingers without me even realising. Like sand or water. Maybe i am being too melancholic because of some incident that remains indelible in my mind. Haha... Perhaps i should be more "lac" and take things easy? Well, reality is never too kind you know.

Morbid. Gothic. Angst.

Alright, i believe there must be some sanguinity left in me to overcome this sudden influx of negative emotions. Perhaps i should be looking forward to the daily banter of my friends and simply the smell of fresh mint; the constant laughter and giggling. Yeah... That was really sweet.

Perhaps i should somehow indulge in books right now. It is something that is inexpensive ( you should see the way i spend money when i am down or extremely happy) and extremely enjoyable. Well, i certainly am not an extreme case of a shopaholic but i have to admit i sometimes am one indeed. BUT... Books don't really depreciate in value do they? Oh well, we'll see if i will actually do what i say.

Went back to swiss today and had a lot of interrogation and questioning from the teachers about sj stuffs i had no idea abt. Goodness gracious, i think i am kinda rusty. Helped zel to train the team for a while before heading to the shops and bought dessert for the family and breakfast for tmr. Pretty normal, except wit hall the talk about H3 lit in english and its like a mini thesis! Freaked the bejesus outta me.

Right, tmr is the chinese speech competition. How wonderful to be "nominated". Guess i just gotta go and try my best. Afterall, its not all about winning but experiencing eh? *twitches eyebrows*


Friday, February 17, 2006 / 9:17 PM

phew! finally submitted my choices for JAE. hope i had made a wise decision after much pondering. i changed my mind at the eleventh hour not to apply for the humanities scholarship after much hemming and hawing~ well... sorry to ms tay and all the teachers who wanted me to go for it but i think it should go to those who needs it more than i do. what a relief!

had JJ road run today...kind of apprehensive at first because i have not been running consistently for quite a long time and my stamina is pretty much rock-bottom. so i told qiwen that i will not chiong but just take it easily since i am feeling not too good today. well, we just ran together and enjoyed the entire run and i got position 88 out of the entire girls division. not something to boast of but i thought it was quite okay for me already. the top 50 girls got medals while the rest till the 100th girl got a pen and pencil as gifts. not too bad, judging by how swiss only gives out medals to the top 20 girls for our cross country.

got home really early today and decided to pig out for a while. my running nose was back and i just had to get some rest. slept from 1pm till 4pm and then woke up to watch some videos. pathetic me with a headache right now. hmm~

oh yeah...there will be a chingay performance in the heartlands at taman jurong tmr. not too sure abt the actual timing but i guess not many ppl will be there since its a saturday. hmm...gotta put on the bulky suit once again. wonder if i still remember the steps? was rehearsing in the shower and i got most of them right. lol....

economics is really kinda tough. completed my tutorial last night but not sure if i got the questions answered correctly. sheesh...i really gotta buck up!

innocent steps is really a good movie. kudos to the lead actress who danced so magnificently!

Tuesday, February 14, 2006 / 10:08 PM
whacked in the head

Wham! Swoosh! Bang! Ka-boom!

This is what's going on in my head right now. A whole load of confusion.Will i be on par with the rest in a totally new environment? Will i be able to adapt? Will i be able to make friends?

Just as Siew Kuang says, its better to have some motivation to push u forward to want to be able to do well like the rest rather than to be complacent by thinking you can always stay at the top.Hmm~ but the problem is does it always happen that way?

I am stuck in a shit hole. Filled to the brim till my chest that i cannot breathe.

The rest seems to have a destination in mind ages ago while i seem to be still loitering the streets, floating aimlessly like some wild spirit. How come they already began with an end in mind? Goodness gracious, i feel really lost right now.

Really wonder if the choices i make are right and am i being over-ambitious? Am i expecting too much from myself? Or perhaps i should just stick to my guns and chase after what i want? Hmm~ talk is free. Or i could just stay at a on-par level and just be a normal person. I guess that's why some ppl chose the path they took so as to shine brighter. Hmm!

Really worried and confused now. WHERE EXACTLY?!?! GRR~~~ Follow my heart is it? Haiz. Very sleepy now.

Sunday, February 12, 2006 / 6:38 PM
release of o' level results

It has certainly been a long wait for my results and i am glad that it turned out just right and gave me a shock though. It certainly felt surreal to stand up when your name was called and be engulfed in a wave of applause. As Miss Kaur sings it, i hope i had the time of my life.

Dinner at Sakae was tremendous fun and we just laughed and yakked non stop. Then Ben came to meet Zel and they left for Bishan while Samo, weewee and me walked around westmall. Saw one of my ASD friend and she got 10 pts! Glad for her!

Got a little sick on Friday night tho...Wad the...Feeling much better now.

Well, gotta think of my options. Feeling quite torn and confused as to whether i will be making a correct decision. As they say, follow where your heart leads, literally.

Thursday, February 09, 2006 / 9:24 PM
its tmr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh my goodness! The results will be out tmr afternoon! OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Alright... There isn't much i can do abt it since the results are fixed. Appl was telling me to just chill and relax a little but huh!!!! How can i possibly relax and not think about it?Haiyo~~~~~

Ok...Will be trying my best not to think too much abt this and try to get a good night's sleep. Get myself all prepped up for tmr. Just hope that Miss Kaur doesn't frown when she hands me my result slip or i will be so dead! Hern...Really very worried about what kind of scores i may get.

All right...No point fretting over my results. I shall take it as it comes.

when life throws you lemons, make lemonade out of them.

/ 7:54 PM
pictures and more words

The sky is falling!Don't u find that ming guang, the middle guy, looks a little like chicken little?Heh heh...

The tooth fairy

EEKS!Digging nose!

My gor gor Mark!We look alike right?

Shi Lei!!!My Chingay trainer for Group A Tronix!!!

Doesn't Siew Kuang look comical with her file??

haiyo...Licia blinked!

zhan hao

crystal looking a tad too sleepy
that's yong rui...
peijia and me

me and chia ming

Sunday, February 05, 2006 / 9:47 PM

Woo hoo! Chingay was a BARKING success! WOOF WOOF!

Shook hands with Minister Balaji and President Nathan and Mah Bow Tan and Amy Khor and Mr Tan Boon Huat and Shi LEI WAS ON THE COVER PAGE OF THE NEWSPAPERS! Lol... In the poodle suit of course.

My first time participating in Chingay and i think it was really a wondrous experience anyone can have in a life time cos its super fun, super noisy and super tiring. Danced in my bulky suit from Orchard all the way to Dhoby Gaut. Heh heh.

Wednesday, February 01, 2006 / 3:03 PM

Your sparkly eyes have gone.
Your earnest smile is lost.
Your warmth has chilled.
Your hug is stiff.

I wonder what has gone wrong?
Why don't you love us anymore?
Why do you have to lie again and again
And make things never the same

You say its nothing
Its just a transition period
But the frequency has increased
And i cannot trust you anymore

You speak of all the great things in the world
You hold me like i am your precious little one
Holding my hand and patting my head
Promise to love me evermore

So what exactly went wrong?
How come you are not the person i used to respect?
Someone disgusting, dirty and damned
A person for me to loathe

You think we will never know
About all the things you lied about
I just don't know what is right or wrong
Or should i believe in life anymore.

Please... Come back. Stop pretending you love me and that you are doing all the right things. I just cannot trust you with all the truth that keeps unfolding. I don't want to hear you speak! I feel so afraid and i don't know how loud it will get. When will it happen again, what will they talk about... Its just a vicious cycle that threatens to destroy. Tears trickle and i cower in fear, but what am i supposed to do? Sigh~ the myth of powerlessness shows its ugly end. Those who lie shall have their tongues cut off.

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musings of a superhero girl
All the love in the world, dear John