Thursday, September 21, 2006 / 6:29 PM
ice jelly

Ice jelly tastes really good wherever and whenever. Typically perfect for such a hot day like today.

Didnt had anything to eat for the entire day except a cup of milo in the morning after PE.Guess i was just plain lazy.I didnt even feel hungry or wad so ever. Guess this is good. Then i can lose all the fats. Or maybe i should just go and get the Flabelos machine and vibrate all my flab away.LOL.Btw that commercial is really cute. All the chubby ladies trying to work out.

GP is tmr and well, i dun really have confidence. I never had confidence anyway. It seems like everyone is well-prepared and all "bring-it-on" except they keep putting on an act saying that they are just as clueless.HUH. Maybe not everyone but there are some.BUT then..I am really worried man. Its like the teachers make the promos sound so easy but i dun think it is. It's like the teachers dun really care abt us. They seem to disregard the importance of the promos and take it like its just another random test that is coming up. Well, some arent even seem worried for us, and its not like everyone is doing great.ARGHH~~Kinda irritating. To think of it from another POV, i guess this is how things work. Our results are dependent on our own hardwork, not the amount of knowledge the teacher imparts. But then to think again, for this one particular topic, we will be tested on this chapter that our teacher hasnt even finish teaching.Crazy. Like we even know what the heck is it about. Grr.

Anyway, i just hope to pass everything so that i can get promoted to J2. Dun even entertain any thoughts of Bs and As but i just hope to get Es and Ds and subpasses.That will be enough already =)

Now really looking forward to the taiwan trip in dec. I mean i can get to see my buddy and all the rest!!It will be quite fun i think. Then can go sight-seeing and shopping and taste all the gr8 food in Taiwan!WOOT~!LOL..

Kinda missed all the Swiss ppl~hope to have a gathering after the promos and just go for a chalet or bbq. U hearing this Alvin?Haha...We should just make it a yearly affair and gather during the end-of-year hols.

Bah..Gotta hit the books again. Super nervous eh. But oh well..To heck with it. ALL THE BEST!!

you are my ice-kachang
in this tropical heat
u r my favourite dessert ooh la la
so inviting so sweet
would u like to bur bur cha cha
come along and dance with me
cos u are the one
eh..forgot the lyrics

Monday, September 18, 2006 / 5:22 PM
dance dance!

Something i realised in the school canteen. Noodles in large amounts are a rarity.

Oh anyway, i am getting kinda attached to the game Bejeweled. I know it is a silly game but somehow i just like to play it and see all the points i chalk up. Then u get to see all the bonuses coming out and see your points getting more and more and woot! HAHA. So no-life right? A bit..

So i have decided to just play Typer Shark instead. My brother is really good at it man, but he got stuck at level 21. But man, i am at a pathetic level 8.

OKAY. I seem to spend too much time on these online games. Really gotta just focus man. Somehow i dun feel the urgency of the promos but just the worrying and fearing of what is going to happen. Feel like a piece of shit now, and the information and facts just doesn't seem to sink in.

And i couldn't sleep last night because i was trying to recall what the "Law of Diminishing Returns" were. I had just read through that chapter before i went to bed and all of a sudden i could not recall anything. Shucks man. Then i got so panic-stricken that i turned on my table light and started to peruse thru again. Siao man. I'm like on the verge of a mental breakdown. HEHE...Not so soon tho. But anyway, this is so unlike me. Sometimes it freaks me out.

And i think i put on some weight.LOL. Positive thinking= i think i have becomed chubbier( we were suppose to learn to replace negative thoughts with positive ones during Civics today). I figured out it could be due to the exam stress and all the cramming that induced appetite. Boy, i eat more when i am stressed. Can see that pimple threatening to break free soon. But oh well, I cannot go for a run cos my knee has not healed and i gotta give it more rest. So there goes the only exercise that i enjoy. Swimming? I better think about that.

Talking about exercise reminds me of PE today. We had a "Dancercise", where we do Hip-Hop during the lesson. The moves taught today were relatively simple and we had a lot of fun laughing at ourselves for looking like OCTOPUSES AND SEAWEEDS for trying to make a wave with our arms.LOL. But it was great fun, as compared to the boring games of captain's ball and basketball and the likes.

Well, GP is this Fri and all the other dreadful papers start next Thur. Feel the impending sense of doom and i hope to get promoted. Keeping my prayers strong!

you never seem to pick me out from the crowd,
but i will always have eyes for you

Tuesday, September 12, 2006 / 6:05 PM

I was chatting with a few of my friends today while awaiting for the next lesson to start when we touched on the topic about the oncoming promos. My friends said that they feel that everyone should get promoted to JC2 irregardless of their promos results cos well, everyone deserves a chance to promote. Besides, it is rather meaningless to repeat JC1. Schools want to retain ppl for fear that they may pull down the percentage and the school and also other students at A levels. Well, i dunno man. I agree that everyone should get promoted cos we have a right to but that is not always the case.

I thought that no matter how badly we have done, we should get promoted cos well, it will be our fault if we flunk the A levels since its our responsibility.We cant blame anyone but ourselves if we screw our future up right? So why do we have to retain ppl and make them feel so wronged?

Then again, these are school policies. If u cant fight them, join them.

As they started on another topic, i thought about this for awhile. PROMOS. What a scary thought. It feels suffocating just to think about it. I mean they are coming in less than 2 weeks and yet i dun feel nervous, just very very worried. And the thing is that some ppl in my school arent even bothered by it. I see some of them going online everyday and staying up chatting till the wee hours of the morning before they catch a couple of hours of sleep and then go to sch. It's like they dun even have to study. Or perhaps they are studying cum chatting. Whichever way it is. Most people seemed prepared and all hyped up for the impending doom while me, the little person almost engulfed by the people around me, is panicking and trying to study as much as i can. SHEESH.

However, I just dun wanna keep thinking abt it. I just wanna pass all of my subjects and get promoted and that's it. HURHUR. Then i shall enjoy my holidays and recharge myself. Then there is the devil whispering into my other ear, telling me i will not be able to do all of that and trying to put me down.Shucks man. Gotta work on my discipline and studies more.

Anyway, any remedies for a worn knee?My left knee is like INJURED.OUCH.Seems like there is something wrong with my tendons and i need lots of rest. But hello? nj is filled with stairs la. So each step i climb brings a "piak" sound to my left knee.Hmmm...Doc says i need lots of rest and no physical activity for a week. Stupid run i had the other day.Ran 4km and then went home to bathe and 15 mins later my left knee complained. Grr..Gr8 man.

Kim Samsoon has gotta be zee most adorable character i have seen! Except for her table manners and also her booming loud voice, that is. She delights me whenver i turn on the TV at 10 pm every weekday night. It is soooooo hilarious to just watch her. Has became my daily ritual. Wonder what would i do without that show?LOL. So cute.

Lovely cupcakes. Lovely chocolates.

Wednesday, September 06, 2006 / 10:02 PM

I was just flipping through my memories when i realised something: there is a sad recurrence to a lot of things in my life. Some stupid and dumb things always happen to me. Like how Samsoon always get the creeps as her boyfriends. So utterly stupid of me to always make the same old mistakes over and over again. The same pulling-hair and frowning situations. You know how many trillion times i tried to scream to myself to stop being so silly?

I think i am depressed.

Perhaps i should take some anti-depressants and run the risk of getting stigmatised by Tom Cruise?HAHA. Anyway, it just feels so surreal bering around these days. Its like there is this horrible disease eating up my soul quietly and slowly, and i feel it but i am not doing anything to curb it. HAHA. Everything is so superficial and fake. Now that i realised the hypocrisy of it all, I am not doing anything. Not taking pragmatic solutions but just watching it all happen. I dunno wads wrong but you know, I cannot help it. Its just like watching someone suffer from internal bleeding and you cant stop the blood. You watch him die.

And then there are all the hatred and angst inside me that is hitting the roof. I feel like a thirteen year old. Like i am stuck in some place and all i can do is to take all the shit and not whine a little. The people around in my school just doesnt seem to care or be generally appreciative of your presence. They look pass your eyes. They pretend to not see you. They look away when you wave to them. Then you wonder why you had to subject yourself to all this shit when u could have enjoyed other ppl's company better. You think "Man i din have to go thru all these". But you gotta bear with it cos there is no other way out. You take all the shit as they come. Can even visualise the words "LOSER", "DOORMAT","NIMCOMPOOP","IDIOT" and etc plastered all over your face.PUHLEASE you say, surely things arent tad bad?

NO, they are tad bad.

I hate to tell myself that this is wad u have chosen so you gotta head down this road. Its your fault so stop trying to blame other ppl for it. You know why this happened so you gotta take responsibility for it. Be proactive! Move your ass and get a life! Then u feel like crying but there are no tears. You seek for true company but no one is there. It feels like you are all alone in a shell and you are blinded by your own fears and anger.

I need a hammer.To break out of that.So who can give it to me?

Sunday, September 03, 2006 / 5:53 PM
crap piece of thang

Just gotten my cellphone repaired and well, its finally WORKING. What kind of modern electronic gadget that boasts of high quality and state-of-the-art programmes is this? I mean the buttons don't even work! So i had to travel all the way down to the Nokia shop at woodlands to get it settled. GRR. I even had to sit with this guy who was so comatosed that he kept leaning towards me. EWW. And he reeked of dried perspiration and hair that has not been washed for like a million lightyears. And he snored!WTH.I practically "siam-ed" to one side.

Hmm..Nothing much nowadays except studying for the upcoming promos.Sheesh.SCARY!And there is still the much dreaded project work and everything that comes along with it.


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All the love in the world, dear John